I remember the days when a break up was pretty easily solved by getting drunk a couple times, a little ego-propping flirting, and work work work. Lately, it seems like staring into space sort of takes up most of the time. Thinking thinking thinking. like maybe I could solve the problem or find the missing piece that then makes the blockage dissolve and all the thoughts and feelings will start moving freely again.
Blogging is so weird. To say this is a disclaimer. It is a jounal that's an advertisement and this one has a filter with no consistency. Do I feel vitual empathy from the four friends who know about this plus imagine how much more i'm getting from the virtual blogging community? The privacy is in knowing that no one is really reading it. what a weird forum for private thoughts. This is an example of the state of my mind when staring.
Anyway, hey. What's up? Today I went snowboarding with TSB, a dope nonprofit that takes young folks up the mountain and matches them with mentors and guest instructors. I spent the day riding goofy only on my toe edge like kiki who did exactly the same thing. all day. And generally had the most amazing attitude about it. She sat down at one point and said, "I'm proud of myself." And I thought, damn, that girl has got it all right. As per the usual in the adult-youth mentor world, I think adults get more out of it.
As for my calves, they got a beating.
I stared out the window the whole bus ride down the pass, mountains like jagged boulders stacked against each other, snow smoothing them out. Washington. So damn beautiful. So damn gray.